That Oh-So-Special Time of Year

A brief history of myself: Every year, right at around exactly this time of year, every single fucking plant decides to bloom on the exact same day, assaulting me with their airborne flower sperm. The second I inhale the aforementioned plant essence, within my body a passing white blood cell will see this harmless gamete, slam on the brakes, get on its radio and shout, "holy fuck, everyone, the goddamn Ebola virus is here!" Then, because my entire immune system is apparently retarded, it will allocate all of its resources to eradicating this taciturn invader. Which leaves me coughing, and sneezing, and dripping out of various orifices, but that's only the beginning. See, while my body mounts "Operation: Kill the Fuck out of That Thing," a real threat will slip in undetected, that exceptional bastard, the common cold. Suddenly, I feel like I've just been punched in the head, and am now coughing and dripping twice as much as before. To make matters worse, I have a very acute form of asthma, which pretty much only gets activated during this deathly time of year, so during the thrall I will often have coughing fits, which will only resolve themselves after they've induced a small amount of vomiting.

I was planning on finishing the week with a proper post, but since right now all I can think of right now is how miserable I am, here you go. Now, so that you'll take actually take something away from this post, here is another link to a random song.